Two weeks can sometimes feel like an eternity and sometimes feel like a blink of an eye. The boys and I arrived in the states two weeks ago today. There is a whole lot of moments I wish I could capture so that I remember to share them all but it is hard to keep track of it all. The boys continue to adjust; as with all children, there are definitely some moments that are better than others. They are extremely strong willed and often like to see where the lines are drawn in regards to how much they can get away with. They do not like much in the way of American food so meal time is always a challenge. They occasionally fight going to sleep but for the most part we have a good routine down of bath, 15 minutes of a movie, several books and then lights out. Last night I got my first ‘I love you so much’ from Mulatu without prompting as he crawled into bed.
They have had several firsts this past week. We went to two different parks. They are fearless when it comes to climbing and rough and tumble activities. They also tried out their bikes for the first time. We have gone a few times since and it is something they ask to do multiple times throughout the day. Nate is riding solo (still with training wheels) but Mulatu is a little too short for his bike so I try to stand nearby to catch him if his balance gets off.
Wednesday was the enjoyable moment of 4.5 hours at the doctors. I never thought we would get out of there. They each dropped 12 vials of blood and multiple tears. I even shed a few myself. Watching my kids cry is not easy on this momma! They took xrays of their hands to try to get a bone age and met with the occupational therapist as well. They both had glowing reports from the doctor and a little nap followed by some ice cream and all was well again.
The meltdowns are still challenging for me to handle but each day I learn a little bit more. We are off to ride bikes on this pretty afternoon so until I have another free moment that is all for now...
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Friday, September 16, 2011
New Normal
Well we have been home a few days now and I'm slowly adjusting to the new normal. Part of that includes waking up around 6:15 every morning. My wonderful mother came over yesterday so I could sleep in. I don't know that there was a better gift I could have been given. I was concerned that I would not sleep well constantly worrying about the kids getting up in the night, etc but we have all been sleeping really well. I have also been trying to put them down for a nap every day and get on a schedule. They usually stay in their beds and talk a while but with some persistance they will fall asleep and get a good nap in after lunch. We've had a few meltdowns from each of them. Typically it comes when they aren't getting their way but they have been a few others as well. It is especially hard when they have these moments because it is hard to comfort them when they can't tell me what is wrong. There also seem to be some brotherly conflicts going on - they talk to each other in their language a lot and from the context and tone you can tell that it isn't always nice. Sharing is not high on their want to list and trying to implement discipline and consequences without knowing if they fully understand me is difficult. We have tried school the past couple of days. Their attention span is pretty short but I'm sure as time goes on it will improve. We are giving them new foods - trying to see what they like and don't like. So far meat is not high on their list of things to eat. They do seem to like peanut butter and lentil soup so I've managed to get some protein in them. Nate really likes noodles so mac and cheese and really anything with semi plain noodles is his favorite. Mulatu is a little less picky but there are still some things he won't have anything to do with. They seem to pick up english words pretty quickly - learning more and more everyday. They are still very quiet when they meet new people.
The past few days have been challenging but there have been some incredibly sweet moments as well. Nate is big on greeting me with a morning kiss usually while I'm still in bed. Mulatu likes to ham it up and often breaks into a cute little dance. It is great watching all the ways their eyes light up and they laugh as they have encountered this new world.
We ventured out yesterday for the first time to visit Grandma's house and see Stitch (our golden retriever). They were a little skiddish at first but warmed up pretty quickly. We also took a trip to Kohls because all of Mulatu's pants were too long. They did pretty well on their first shopping experience. Today we went to Kroger and they both drove the cars under the carts. Mulatu fell asleep about 3/4 through.
I realize a lot of what I'm facing and feeling is just like every new parent - there are new adventures every day and I'm trying to enjoy the moments and not focus on the little things that don't work out the way I think they should. I have a lot of support around me and I honestly couldn't do it without it. Although I feel a tremendous amount of responsibility and I realize as a single parent this isn't going to be a walk in the park I am confident that this is exactly where God wants me to be. Next week I start working from home - hopefully this will be an easy transition for me.
The past few days have been challenging but there have been some incredibly sweet moments as well. Nate is big on greeting me with a morning kiss usually while I'm still in bed. Mulatu likes to ham it up and often breaks into a cute little dance. It is great watching all the ways their eyes light up and they laugh as they have encountered this new world.
We ventured out yesterday for the first time to visit Grandma's house and see Stitch (our golden retriever). They were a little skiddish at first but warmed up pretty quickly. We also took a trip to Kohls because all of Mulatu's pants were too long. They did pretty well on their first shopping experience. Today we went to Kroger and they both drove the cars under the carts. Mulatu fell asleep about 3/4 through.
I realize a lot of what I'm facing and feeling is just like every new parent - there are new adventures every day and I'm trying to enjoy the moments and not focus on the little things that don't work out the way I think they should. I have a lot of support around me and I honestly couldn't do it without it. Although I feel a tremendous amount of responsibility and I realize as a single parent this isn't going to be a walk in the park I am confident that this is exactly where God wants me to be. Next week I start working from home - hopefully this will be an easy transition for me.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
We're Home
Sept 8 -
Well today I received the visa/passports for the kids and the sealed packets I have to hand over to immigration. It is quite surreal to know that everything is done and all we are doing is waiting to get on the plane to head home. I had a great day today of playing with the boys. We worked puzzles, colored, did a sticker book and played soccer outside. They also wrote their names some and we played a game where we worked on their color and number skills. It felt so good to be able to help them learn - there is going to be some challenges ahead for sure but there is also going to be some incredible fun and rewarding times. I know at times I've felt overwhelemed but today I just feel great and I know it is going to get so much easier once we are in our own home. 2 more nights and we'll be headed back!
Sept 9 -
It is our last night in Addis - tomorrow we begin our journey home. There are so many thoughts running through my head but mostly I'm just ready to be home with my boys. I know the 17 hour plane ride is not going to be easy but I also know God will provide me the strength to endure. Today we said goodbye to two families - they had a special ceremony with coffee and popcorn. All the kids from the transition home came to the ceremony - it was very emotional - knowing all the love that was represented by them being there. Each one is just waiting for their family to come and get them. I so much want to know what is going through my kids heads. The communication has worked most of the time but I so much want to make sure all of their needs are met and it is hard when I can't ask them. I never thought this day would come - the week has in some ways felt like an eternity but in other ways it feels like it has been quickly. I know that the next few days will be the most trying but it is all part of the journey to bring them home.
Sept 11 -
Well we packed up and headed out at about 5:30 yesterday - I had a horrible nights sleep - just a lot of stuff running through my head but my stomach wasn't feeling the best either. We had several firsts at the airport - first escalator, first straw - to name a few. They both crashed before we checked into the flight so we had to lug their dead weight around through the airport as we headed toward security. Unfortantely, they required them to walk through by themselves. I didn't think we were going to get Mulatu woken up enough...They were pretty excited about the movies and games on the plane but they soon gave way to the sleep. They slept well for several hours - it was peaceful to watch them - 17 hours is so brutal. There is no way getting around it. My stomach started to hurt about 10 hours in and I was so thankful my mother was there. I took some fenigrin which knocked me out but it seemed to subdue whatever was going on in my stomach. Customs/immigation was a breeze. We are all exhausted so it is hard to judge things at this point. I'm trying to remember that God led me down this journey and maintain a sense of rationality. Sometimes it seems so crazy that I now have these two little people that I'm responsible for. We got to our hotel super early but after a trip to IHOP where the boys throughly enjoyed some pancakes and mac & cheese and eggs. We came to the hotel for a bath and a little decompressing time - Each day holds new promise as we continue to learn about one another - I continue to pray for strength and wisdom everyday.
Well today I received the visa/passports for the kids and the sealed packets I have to hand over to immigration. It is quite surreal to know that everything is done and all we are doing is waiting to get on the plane to head home. I had a great day today of playing with the boys. We worked puzzles, colored, did a sticker book and played soccer outside. They also wrote their names some and we played a game where we worked on their color and number skills. It felt so good to be able to help them learn - there is going to be some challenges ahead for sure but there is also going to be some incredible fun and rewarding times. I know at times I've felt overwhelemed but today I just feel great and I know it is going to get so much easier once we are in our own home. 2 more nights and we'll be headed back!
Sept 9 -
It is our last night in Addis - tomorrow we begin our journey home. There are so many thoughts running through my head but mostly I'm just ready to be home with my boys. I know the 17 hour plane ride is not going to be easy but I also know God will provide me the strength to endure. Today we said goodbye to two families - they had a special ceremony with coffee and popcorn. All the kids from the transition home came to the ceremony - it was very emotional - knowing all the love that was represented by them being there. Each one is just waiting for their family to come and get them. I so much want to know what is going through my kids heads. The communication has worked most of the time but I so much want to make sure all of their needs are met and it is hard when I can't ask them. I never thought this day would come - the week has in some ways felt like an eternity but in other ways it feels like it has been quickly. I know that the next few days will be the most trying but it is all part of the journey to bring them home.
Sept 11 -
Well we packed up and headed out at about 5:30 yesterday - I had a horrible nights sleep - just a lot of stuff running through my head but my stomach wasn't feeling the best either. We had several firsts at the airport - first escalator, first straw - to name a few. They both crashed before we checked into the flight so we had to lug their dead weight around through the airport as we headed toward security. Unfortantely, they required them to walk through by themselves. I didn't think we were going to get Mulatu woken up enough...They were pretty excited about the movies and games on the plane but they soon gave way to the sleep. They slept well for several hours - it was peaceful to watch them - 17 hours is so brutal. There is no way getting around it. My stomach started to hurt about 10 hours in and I was so thankful my mother was there. I took some fenigrin which knocked me out but it seemed to subdue whatever was going on in my stomach. Customs/immigation was a breeze. We are all exhausted so it is hard to judge things at this point. I'm trying to remember that God led me down this journey and maintain a sense of rationality. Sometimes it seems so crazy that I now have these two little people that I'm responsible for. We got to our hotel super early but after a trip to IHOP where the boys throughly enjoyed some pancakes and mac & cheese and eggs. We came to the hotel for a bath and a little decompressing time - Each day holds new promise as we continue to learn about one another - I continue to pray for strength and wisdom everyday.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
All is Final
September 6 -
We arrived yesterday morning- had a wonderful, relaxing drive to DC - was able to take a swim in the hotel pool and get a good nights rest before heading out on Sunday. The flight was long but uneventful. I was able to watch a few good movies but I didn't get much sleep when we arrived I had my reunion with the boys. They seemed to remember me and their faces lit up with those smiles I had been missing. We played with several of the toys I had brought. I got some sleep last night but I still felt pretty exhausted. I had forgotten how much that flight kicks my butt. Right now I'm watching the boys sleeping in my room - we have had a full day of always outside, reading, and learning new things. They can both count and seem to know some letters. We are learning the English words for all sorts of things. Today Nate went in his room and brought out the book I'd made him and showed me my picture. It was so sweet. I love these two boys so much. I can't wait until we are home and can get on a schedule. Until then I'll just take it one day at a time pouring all the love I can into them.
September 7 -
So last night I was pretty intimidated by the whole embassy appointment and I didn't get a whole lot of sleep. We had to get up bright and early this morning - breakfast was at 6:30 - we left at 7. Part of the embassy appointment included taking the boys with me so we all piled into the van for the hour ride. The interview went extremely well - few simple questions and everything is now finale. After the embassy we brought the boys back to the transitional home and then spent the afternoon shopping - I was able to pick up some CD/DVDs in their language and berbere spice that they can sprinkle on the American food as they get used to new flavors. I'm counting the days until we are home and a whole new adventure begins. I have moments when I question whether I am really up to this but I have to continually remind myself that I am not in this alone and God will provide me with everything I read.
We arrived yesterday morning- had a wonderful, relaxing drive to DC - was able to take a swim in the hotel pool and get a good nights rest before heading out on Sunday. The flight was long but uneventful. I was able to watch a few good movies but I didn't get much sleep when we arrived I had my reunion with the boys. They seemed to remember me and their faces lit up with those smiles I had been missing. We played with several of the toys I had brought. I got some sleep last night but I still felt pretty exhausted. I had forgotten how much that flight kicks my butt. Right now I'm watching the boys sleeping in my room - we have had a full day of always outside, reading, and learning new things. They can both count and seem to know some letters. We are learning the English words for all sorts of things. Today Nate went in his room and brought out the book I'd made him and showed me my picture. It was so sweet. I love these two boys so much. I can't wait until we are home and can get on a schedule. Until then I'll just take it one day at a time pouring all the love I can into them.
September 7 -
So last night I was pretty intimidated by the whole embassy appointment and I didn't get a whole lot of sleep. We had to get up bright and early this morning - breakfast was at 6:30 - we left at 7. Part of the embassy appointment included taking the boys with me so we all piled into the van for the hour ride. The interview went extremely well - few simple questions and everything is now finale. After the embassy we brought the boys back to the transitional home and then spent the afternoon shopping - I was able to pick up some CD/DVDs in their language and berbere spice that they can sprinkle on the American food as they get used to new flavors. I'm counting the days until we are home and a whole new adventure begins. I have moments when I question whether I am really up to this but I have to continually remind myself that I am not in this alone and God will provide me with everything I read.
Friday, September 2, 2011
Until Addis
There are some moments in life you wish you could capture in a bottle so that you can relive them over and over. For me this is one of the moments. As expected this past week has flown. When I get home the only thing I want to do is concentrate on spending time with my beautiful sons. With that in mind, I’ve crammed as much shopping, cleaning and yard work into the past week as possible. I have packed and repacked for this trip numerous times. I’m almost there, just a few more things to throw in the bag tonight and I’ll be ready. Throughout the past week I have been once again reminded of how much support and love I have behind me. I can’t tell you how many people have told me that not only are they praying for me but they have laid it on the hearts of those in their churches to pray as well, many of whom I don’t even know. I know that I am truly blessed. It has been my hope from the beginning that my family’s story will inspire others to actions (both big and small) that will make our world a better place and in doing so will bring honor and glory to God. I’m sure the coming days will be filled with many memories and stories. I seek to soak up every moment and fully embrace this journey God has led me down. It seemed at times I would never get to his point in the path but I’m here now and I’m so excited to see what lies beyond the next hill.
Thursday, August 25, 2011
Case Cleared
I can never tire of seeing that subject in my inbox. I frequently check my email on my phone even before getting in the shower and could hardly believe what I found yesterday morning. It was an unexpected start to my work day to say the least. I immediately called my parents as I did a dance around the room. A couple things I noticed as I traveled to work yesterday after receiving the news: I drove much faster than normal (I believe there was some crazy adrenaline pumping through me), I found myself sweating and my heart beating fast, and I sang worship songs at the top of my lungs with a very grateful heart.
Since then I have had some time to process the reality that I now know when my boys are coming home but in some ways it still seems like a dream. My mind has been in a whirlwind trying to make sure I have taken care of everything. I booked flights today, 3 tickets to Addis, 5 coming home. There is a sense of finality in seeing the names of my sons on their own plane tickets. I am working on getting hotel rooms, follow up appointments, travel insurance, and making mental lists of what I need to make sure to pack. In addition, I’m trying to make sure I have everything covered at work and don’t leave behind any loose ends.
As I look back from this side, the wait has been brutal. I always knew that God would be faithful even on days when it seemed the waiting world never end. Last Sunday there was this realization that hit me in a powerful way. I realized that God would be victorious in this battle. I had no idea that the victory would come this week but I’m so thankful. All that is left now is a short trip to Ethiopia, an interview at the US embassy, collecting their visas and we are home clear. The adventure is just beginning and I can’t wait to see what is around the next corner.
Since then I have had some time to process the reality that I now know when my boys are coming home but in some ways it still seems like a dream. My mind has been in a whirlwind trying to make sure I have taken care of everything. I booked flights today, 3 tickets to Addis, 5 coming home. There is a sense of finality in seeing the names of my sons on their own plane tickets. I am working on getting hotel rooms, follow up appointments, travel insurance, and making mental lists of what I need to make sure to pack. In addition, I’m trying to make sure I have everything covered at work and don’t leave behind any loose ends.
As I look back from this side, the wait has been brutal. I always knew that God would be faithful even on days when it seemed the waiting world never end. Last Sunday there was this realization that hit me in a powerful way. I realized that God would be victorious in this battle. I had no idea that the victory would come this week but I’m so thankful. All that is left now is a short trip to Ethiopia, an interview at the US embassy, collecting their visas and we are home clear. The adventure is just beginning and I can’t wait to see what is around the next corner.
Monday, August 1, 2011
Weekends are the hardest
Weekends are the hardest and last weekend was probably the hardest yet. My birthday was Saturday and I believed for some time that if my sons weren’t home yet, I would at least be with them Ethiopia. As time neared and I realized that that too wasn’t possible, I had hoped that I would know my Embassy date. Many people even told me how poetic and wonderful it would be to have that given to me as a birthday gift. It didn’t happen. I tried to make the most of my birthday but honestly the only thing I want is to be with my kids. No present or delicious dinner or special outing could change that. I was reading the second book in the Hunger Games this weekend. In it there is a shield around the arena that throws back everything that hits it. This is how I’ve felt recently about my prayers. I’ve been praying for so long to bring my sons home and I still feel like it is so far away. I know I’m not alone in these prayers. In the midst of this I have found myself battling moments of doubt. That doesn’t stop me from praying. Yesterday at church Brian discussed moments of crying out to God being stretched out face down on the ground. After a very long day, I found myself face down on my bedroom floor last night begging God to bring my sons home.
I did receive a new picture of Mulatu on Friday. Apparently a family that was at the transition house had taken it. He looked so cute in one of the shirts I had taken for him back in May. It brought to mind a song that Aaron Ivey sung about his son while waiting to bring him home from Haiti.
“Another photograph to wrestle in my head…these thoughts of you like bullets to my soul, We’ve got to find a way to get you home….Lightyears away I hope you know there is somebody searching for the way to get you here"
I'm trying to hang in there and remember that I'm not traveling this journey alone. It is a new month and with that comes new hope.
I did receive a new picture of Mulatu on Friday. Apparently a family that was at the transition house had taken it. He looked so cute in one of the shirts I had taken for him back in May. It brought to mind a song that Aaron Ivey sung about his son while waiting to bring him home from Haiti.
“Another photograph to wrestle in my head…these thoughts of you like bullets to my soul, We’ve got to find a way to get you home….Lightyears away I hope you know there is somebody searching for the way to get you here"
I'm trying to hang in there and remember that I'm not traveling this journey alone. It is a new month and with that comes new hope.
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